Tag Archives: men

Revisiting Mars and Venus, by Tisha Smith, LPCMH

Dear Martians and Venetians,

Do you remember that old book that you probably never read, but also never forgot?   In 1992, a psychologist named John Gray, wrote the well-known book called Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus – “the classic guide to understanding the opposite sex.”  Picking this book back up recently, I was immediately reminded why it became so popular – because it was spot on!

Pick up a copy, and you will be glad you did.

MEN ARE FROM MARS                                                          WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS

A man’s sense of self is defined                                           A woman’s sense of self is defined

through his ability to achieve results.                                 through her feelings and the quality

of her relationships.


To offer a man unsolicited advice is to                             Generally, when a woman offers

presume that he doesn’t know what to                              unsolicited advice or tries to “help”

do or that he can’t do it on his own.                                   a man, she has no idea how critical

and unloving she may sound to him.

To feel better men go to their caves

To solve problems alone.                                                     To feel better women want to get

together and openly talk about problems


Just as a man is fulfilled through working                         A woman is fulfilled through talking

out the intricate details of solving a problem.                   about the details of her problem.


Men are motivated and empowered when                     Woman are motivated and empowered

they feel needed and respected. Not to                         when they feel loved and cherished. Not

be needed is a slow death for a man.                               to feel loved is a slow death for a woman.


The secret of empowering a man is never                       A woman needs is continued reassurance

to try to change him or improve him, do this                 of the man’s love for her. Just because

and he will grow on his own because he no longer       she is told once does not mean she does

must resist change.                                                             not need to hear it every day.


A woman should not be judged for needing

reassurance of her value, specialness or her

need to talk.

A man should not be judged for his

need for respect, to solve problems and go to

his cave to withdrawal and reboot.


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